25 Abrasive Behaviors that Lead to Employee Resignation

Are valued employees leaving your organization because of one particular leader? This leader is known for explosive angry outbursts, condescending comments, and public humiliation of employees?

Perhaps you can relate to this concern from an executive leader I recently spoke to.

“She has an abrasive personality. Several of my employees are threatening to quit because of how she treats people.

When I talk to the leader about the complaints I’ve received about her behavior, she blames everyone else. She isn’t able to see the negative impact she has.

We’re caught between a rock and a hard place. We don’t want to lose the expertise of this leader, but we’re on the verge of losing other valuable employees.”

In today’s blog, we list common behaviors of those considered to have an “abrasive personality”. As one who doesn’t like labels, keep the following in mind as you read the list below:

• While we all can have a bad day from time to time when we say and do things that others perceive as abrasive, the key is if there’s a pattern of these behaviors.
• The phrase “abrasive personality” is often used to describe someone who exhibits behaviors that are off-putting to others. Webster’s dictionary describes synonyms for the word abrasive such as “aggravating, bothersome, irritating, disturbing, and maddening”.
• Read the list to gain insight into what your employees are going through when they work directly with a leader whose behavior is perceived as abrasive. The list of behaviors offers you perspective as to why your employees may be on the verge of quitting.
• People who exhibit abrasive behaviors often lack self-awareness about the impact of their behavior on others.

25 Examples of Abrasive Personality Behaviors

While any number of behaviors can be considered abrasive, the following are common examples I hear from employees who work for a leader whose behavior is considered abrasive.

1. Yelling
2. Overreactive
3. Poor emotional control
4. Micromanaging
5. Public Humiliation
6. Over-controlling
7. Disengaged/disinterested
8. Demanding
9. Condescending
10. Demeaning
11. Insulting
12. Arrogant
13. Retaliation
14. Rude/abrupt
15. Intimidating
16. Moody
17. Doesn’t conceal emotions
18. Has favorites
19. Oversteps boundaries
20. Leaps to conclusions
21. Makes inappropriate comments
22. Lacks work/life balance
23. Focuses on the negative
24. Avoids personal responsibility
25. Unapproachable

When abrasive behavior is left unaddressed, employees suffer from symptoms ranging from anxiety to suicidal thoughts.

It’s up to you as an executive leader or HR professional to intervene with leaders who exhibit abrasive behavior. The good news is it is possible for abrasive behavior to be transformed into healthy behaviors.

My Leadership Turnaround coaching program has an 82% success rate in equipping leaders to replace abrasive behaviors with interpersonal skills.

Let’s talk about what you can do to stop abrasive behaviors at your organization and protect the well-being of your employees … and retain your best employees.

Schedule a complimentary call to talk now.

About the author

Bonnie Artman Fox has a background as Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and Psychiatric Registered Nurse. Today her primary role is working with leaders as an organizational health consultant to create work cultures employees never want to leave. Bonnie is the author of the best-selling book How Did My Family Get In My Office?!