The last several blogs have addressed various conflict management patterns that show up in business relationships and the workplace. These are patterns learned in childhood that are learned by age six or seven to cope when things got tense. You may identify with a couple patterns and based on the circumstances use each one at different times. Below is a summary of each pattern and they show up in business relationships.
1. Controller – Leading is necessary, but to demand one’s own way using derogatory language alienates employees rather than motivates,
Strength – gets things done
2. Avoider – While there is a time and place to deal with conflict, this pattern avoids addressing conflict through self-sufficiency and self-reliance.
Strength – Sticks to themselves and doesn’t get involved in office politics
3. Pleaser – Attempts to smooth over conflict by an over the top display of care to caretaking that ends up enabling unacceptable behavior and crippling employees from reaching their full potential.
Strength – Brings sense of warmth and concern for co-workers
4. Jokester – Diffuses conflict with humor , sarcasm, or jokes in an attempt to divert attention from the conflict and bring levity to the situation. Sometimes this person is in the limelight a star performer because of their charisma and ability to make people laugh.
Strength – Fun to be around
5. Computer – Focuses on facts and analysis to validate the logic of their position. By sticking to numbers, strategies avoids the relational aspect of relationships.
Strength –Provide needed data in order to make wise business decisions.
Go To EQ Formula to transform your conflict management pattern: Stabilizer
By having self-awareness of your default conflict management pattern, when conversations or situations get conflict, you can make a conscious choice to work through the issue at directly, keeping the main thing the main thing. While there can be many layers to conflict resolution, when everyone shows up willing to address the real problems without resorting to a default pattern, resolution can be arrived at with less angst and relationships can be strengthened in the process.
Steps to changing your conflict management pattern: