Transform Scars into Leadership Strengths

Are there certain stories you turn to when you need inspiration?

One of mine is the story of Princess Eugenie. As a child, she had surgery to correct a curvature of her spine called scoliosis, leaving a long scar down her back. Years later, on her wedding day, she chose a gown with a deep V-back, designed intentionally to reveal her scar. She even skipped wearing a veil so that the scar would remain visible.

In one of the most public moments of her life, she made a powerful statement…

This is a part of me. I’m not hiding it.

I find her courage fascinating because most of us do the opposite. Whether our scars are physical or emotional, we tend to cover them up. We tell ourselves they’re something to be ashamed of.

My Own Scar Story

I carry a scar above my left eye from a car accident.

For years, it made me feel self-conscious. When a friend was recently in an accident, I called her and found myself sharing my own story. In that moment, I realized something important: our scars connect us.

Instead of being marks of shame, they can be reminders of survival, resilience, and even points of empathy with others.

What Scars Teach Us About Leadership

This lesson applies to both our personal lives and how we lead.

In business, many cultures mirror unhealthy family systems, demanding perfection, discouraging vulnerability, and rewarding those who hide weaknesses. Leaders absorb that message and push themselves to perform flawlessly.

Perfectionism has a shadow side. Leaders who refuse to acknowledge their “scars”, their insecurities, mistakes, or blind spots, often come across as abrasive, hard-driving, or unapproachable. Employees feel they can’t speak up, and eventually, the very pursuit of perfection drives good people away.

The truth is, scars only remain “ugly” when we refuse to acknowledge them. When we accept them, they become teachers. They remind us that mistakes are part of being human, and that humility, not pride, is what builds trust and strong teams.

The Turnaround

I’ve seen it again and again: when leaders embrace vulnerability instead of hiding it, everything shifts. They build workplaces where people feel safe to take risks, admit mistakes, and contribute their best ideas. They gain credibility, not because they’re perfect, but because they’re real.

Success doesn’t come from dismissing parts of ourselves, it comes from integrating all of who we are: strengths and scars alike.

An Invitation

On October 2nd, I’ll be joining others at the Samaritan Spirit Gala to share more about how counseling, faith, and pertinacity can truly turn scars into strengths. I’d love for you to join us.

Register for the Gala here

Because when we stop hiding our scars and instead share them with humility, we not only free ourselves, we create the space for others to do the same.